So how unfortunate is it that I miss Maryssa?
Or maybe I should say pathetic. I don’t know, I just don’t want to be missing her anymore… or at least the version that I dated because she (like me and almost everyone else I know) has changed quite a bit since the time we dated two years ago. She broke up with me two years ago and I never really got over her. I don’t think you just “get over” someone who impacts your life the way she did. You just accept and move on. But I still miss her. Although the (vast) majority of our relationship troubles stemmed from my greatly fucking up, she also made mistakes but in all honesty… she was wonderful. She really was. She was brilliant in every way and I was extremely lucky to have dated her, especially for as long as I did. And she was a great friend to me to; one of the best I’ve had… and we don’t even talk anymore and it’s just really shitty. I wanted to be friends with her again starting this summer but now it seems that won’t happen so I’m forced to just be stuck with my nostalgic melancholic memories of her and the relationship we once had. And it sucks.
I just listened to one of “our” songs by Faded Paper Figures and that was also a shitty idea… She just taught me so much about how to unconditionally love someone and how to properly show it. The lessons didn’t become fully prevalent until I experienced what it feels like to lose someone great.
I miss her every day. She really was lovely.
(Edited for coolness by me)